About Chris Rock: Christopher Julius is an American comedian, actor, screenwriter, producer, and director.
You don't need a critic to tell you people aren't laughing.
Comedy is a group activity, a verbal orgy.
I realized with Broadway everything written for black people is usually written in the past, and I'm kind of a contemporary guy. I don't think you want to see me in 'Raisin in the Sun'.
Welcome to the 77th and last Oscars.
I live way below my means.
Kids always act up the most before they go to sleep.
I'm a big fan of Katt Williams, Jim Gaffigan, Louie CK, Margaret Cho, Kathy Griffin, Rich Vas, Joey Vega and Matt Claybrooks.
If a woman tells you she's twenty and looks sixteen, she's twelve. If she tells you she's twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she's damn near forty.
You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to wa...
You got a gun, you don't have to work out.
Gay people got a right to be as miserable as everyone else.
I used to work at McDonald's making minimum wage. You know what that means when someone pays you minimum wage? You know what your boss was trying to say? "Hey if I could pay you less, I would, but it's against the law.
You know, some people say life is short and that you could get hit by a bus at any moment and that you have to live each day like it's your last. Bullshit. Life is long. You're probably not gonna get hit by a bus. And you're gonna have to live with t...
You don’t need no gun control, you know what you need? We need some bullet control. Men, we need to control the bullets, that’s right. I think all bullets should cost five thousand dollars… five thousand dollars per bullet… You know why? Caus...
We got so much food in America we're allergic to food. Allergic to food! Hungry people ain't allergic to shit. You think anyone in Rwanda's got a fucking lactose intolerance?!
Men lie the most, women tell the biggest lies.
Men are as faithful as their options.
Wealth is not about having a lot of money; it's about having a lot of options.
Women need food, water, and compliments That's right. And an occasional pair of shoes.
You cannot win in a fight against women, cause men have a need to make sense
Only a woman can make you feel wrong for doing something right.
