Quotes by C. Terry Warner

About C. Terry Warner:

C. Terry Warner is an American academic, author and business consultant. He wrote the book Bonds That Make Us Free and founded the Arbinger Institute which does consulting and training based on his academic work on the foundations of human behavior and self-deception. In writings and seminars, Warner argues that we are responsible for our own actions and even negative emotions which we often use to accuse others rather than responding to their needs. We therefore have the power to free our relationships with others from negativity.
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Did I love what I was doing, or did I love myself in doing it?

C. Terry Warner

Still is just the right way to be. You rise in the morning to go about your day. You remember a friend who has troubles. You don't quibble with yourself about whether to call her; you don't write a reminder on your Palm Pilot or in your planner to ma...

C. Terry Warner

Except in a very few matches, usually with world-class performers, there is a point in every match (and in some cases it's right at the beginning) when the loser decides he's going to lose. And after that, everything he does will be aimed at providin...

C. Terry Warner

Personal growth is not like the development of a skill. It does not take place in observable increments that can be measured and charted. Indeed, as we have seen, when we're growing in sensitivity, generosity, and compassion, we're not aware of it, b...

C. Terry Warner

Some things are only real because they represent what we think. When we learn the truth and think it, the old reality is no longer real to us and loses its hold on us. The truth sets us free.

C. Terry Warner

Self-betrayal occurs when we do to another what we sense we should not do or don't do what we sense we should. Thus self-betrayal is a sort of moral self-compromise, a violation of our own personal sense of how we ought to be and what we ought to do.

C. Terry Warner

Blame is the lie by which we convince ourselves that we are victims. It is the lie that robs us of our serenity, our generosity, our confidence, an our delight in life . . . For it is the act of blaming that can't co-exist with self-responsibility --...

C. Terry Warner

The self-help movement that began in the latter half of the twentieth century suffers particularly from this flaw, for the personal and interpersonal skills it seeks to cultivate are almost always designed to get us more of what we think we want, rat...

C. Terry Warner

When we criticize people, their consciences console them. When we love them, their consciences indict them.

C. Terry Warner

Living in the box means being convinced that other people and our circumstances are responsible for our feelings and our helplessness to overcome them. What we can't see when we're in the box is that the way the world appears to us is our projection,...

C. Terry Warner

Honest self-understanding liberates us from our stuck emotions.

C. Terry Warner

Our humanity consists in our ability to sense and respect and respond to the humanity of others.

C. Terry Warner

The very fact that we need to struggle for approval proves that we do not approve of ourselves. Having to convince ourselves of something means we do not really believe it. That is why we contort ourselves grotesquely, lose sight of who we really are...

C. Terry Warner

We influence others most profoundly when we do not seek to change them at all, but simply go about straightforwardly doing the right and loving thing.

C. Terry Warner

A responsible step in loosening the grip of any lie we might be living is to ask ourselves, solemnly and seriously, this momentous question: "Might I be in the wrong?" What gives this question its power? The answer can be stated very simply: Just to ...

C. Terry Warner

Author Bio

  • NameC. Terry Warner
  • DescriptionAmerican writer
  • ProfessionWriter