Babies are never suicidal. Hard lives, not hard boiled eggs do that.
If you want to commit suicide why tell anyone? They'd ruin everything.
I dreamed of being special then awoke to be unique.
The shot glass is half drunk.
I couldn't stop so I quit.
I recovered from recovering so no longer celebrate not doing bad things to defend myself as good. I added new bad for good measure.
I learned to smile, avoiding happiness advice.
I'm all groan up in America.
I overreacted to praise, signing an autograph. I'd write a check to buy it back.
Self talk and self prayer: When you audible the first and correctly interpret, the white coats correct you in a nuthouse. When you audible the second and misinterpret, the dinner coats swear you to an oath in the White House. Does this make you nuts ...
Our atheist thoughts go out to his family following their loss.
Objects in the mirror are closer than they appear so don't look and they'll stay farther away than you expect they would.
All surgery and no makeup make Jack a dull girl.
The fine line between genius and madness is a punch line. Duck, you idiot!
If sensing so badly of yourself you also sense a need to make me sense that, then I sense sadly that you cannot make better sense … sadder still if you cannot sense my sincerity.
If you sense so badly that you also sense a need to make me sense that, then I sense sadly that you cannot make better sense ... sadder still if you cannot sense my sincerity.
Honesty is the best insurance policy.
He who laughs last laughs ... doesn't get it.
If life was fair ... one third of the people would comprise of judges and lawyers ... one third of police and prison officials ... and one third of legislators ... and one third more to make the other three thirds make any sense at all .... Thank goo...
When to others it's not lying. It's privacy.
Dad got furious when we lied to him. No, Dad got furious then we lied to him.
