Marla Singer: You're the worst thing that's ever happened to me.
Tyler Durden: This isn't love, it's sport fucking.
Tyler Durden: My dad never went to college, so it was real important that I go. Narrator: Sounds familiar. Tyler Durden: So I graduate, I call him up long distance, I say "Dad, now what?" He says, "Get a job." Narrator: Same here. Tyler Durden: Now I...
Narrator: [to Tyler, while looking at a Calvin Klein-esque ad on the bus] Is that what a real man is supposed to look like?
[Tyler and Narrator are discussing ideal opponents] Tyler Durden: OK: any historic figure. Narrator: I'd fight Gandhi. Tyler Durden: Good answer. Narrator: How about you? Tyler Durden: Lincoln. Narrator: Lincoln? Tyler Durden: Big guy, big reach. Ski...
Narrator: Tyler, I'm grateful to you; for everything that you've done for me. But this is too much. I don't want this. Tyler Durden: What do you want? Wanna go back to the shit job, fuckin' condo world, watching sitcoms? Fuck you, I won't do it.
Lou: [Lou hits Tyler in the face] Do you hear me now? Tyler Durden: No, I didn't quite catch that, Lou. [Lou hits Tyler again] Tyler Durden: Still not getting it. [Lou hits Tyler a few more times] Tyler Durden: Ok, I got it. Shit, I lost it. [Lou con...
Marla Singer: ...Condom is the glass slipper of our generation. You slip one on when you meet a stranger. You dance all night... then you throw it away. The condom, I mean, not the stranger. Narrator: What?
Tyler Durden: [to the police chief] Hi. You're going to call off your rigorous investigation. You're going to publicly state that there is no underground group. Or... these guys are going to take your balls. They're going to send one to the New York ...
[meeting aboard an airliner] Narrator: What do you do for a living? Tyler Durden: Why? So you can pretend like you're interested?
Richard Chesler: Get the fuck out of here, you're fired! Narrator: I have a better solution. You keep me on the payroll as an outside consultant and in exchange for my salary, my job will be never to tell people these things that I know. I don't even...
Tyler Durden: [the Narrator is trying to disarm a car bomb of nitroglycerin] You don't know which wire to pull. Narrator: I know everything you do, so if you know I know. Tyler Durden: Or maybe, since I knew you'd know I spent all days thinking about...
Tyler Durden: In the world I see - you are stalking elk through the damp canyon forests around the ruins of Rockefeller Center. You'll wear leather clothes that will last you the rest of your life. You'll climb the wrist-thick kudzu vines that wrap t...
Narrator: I am Jack's wasted life.
Narrator: [Tyler steers the car into the opposite lane and accelerates] What are you doing? Tyler Durden: Guys, what would you wish you'd done before you died? Ricky: Paint a self-portrait. The Mechanic: Build a house. Tyler Durden: [to Narrator] And...
Narrator: A guy who came to Fight Club for the first time, his ass was a wad of cookie dough. After a few weeks, he was carved out of wood.
Tyler Durden: Self improvement is masturbation. Now self destruction...
Narrator: I am Jack's broken heart.
