This Book Title is Invisible Quotes

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

If someone is playing on my fear, the natural tendency for a person is to throw all their energy and focus into protecting that vulnerability. But I say if you’re playing on my fear to the left, I’m going to look to the right and try to find out ...

This Book Title is Invisible

Whenever I see a gorgeous woman, I think, Who is that tall drink of water, and how come I’m suddenly thirsty?

This Book Title is Invisible

I’m thinking ahead to how I’ll be thinking back to me thinking ahead in this moment.

This Book Title is Invisible

It is possible to be in two dreams at once. If I dream about you, and you are asleep at the time, you are in both your dreams, and mine. Still, you’re not really in my dream, are you? It’s like a party you’re invited to, but aren’t allowed en...

This Book Title is Invisible

I make my own cologne. It’s called “Sweat,” and it’s hard work making it. But I can tell people love it, because they’re so envious and jealous when I wear it that they avoid me altogether.

This Book Title is Invisible

Do you find it erotic how my pants bulge in the crotch, where I keep my coffee cup?

This Book Title is Invisible

Even though I believe birthday parties should be given, not taken, I wish someone would take all of mine and hide them on the other side of eternity.

This Book Title is Invisible

When my now ex wife said she wanted a separation, I was horrified. So I said, “You want me to wear a condom?!

This Book Title is Invisible

We made love like September swims in August. But that’s natural, because it’s too cold to go swimming in October.

This Book Title is Invisible

Doing autograph sessions all day is not what I signed up for. But that’s just all part of not being famous.

This Book Title is Invisible

With a tough decision, the act of flipping a coin allows you to figure out which you really prefer, because as the coin is spinning, you find yourself slightly pulling for either heads or tails. No need to follow the coin’s outcome—choose the sid...

This Book Title is Invisible

Don’t tell me your name. If you don’t tell me your name, I can’t hurt your feelings by forgetting it.

This Book Title is Invisible

Of all the flowers from a rose to a carnation, I’d die for reincarnation.

This Book Title is Invisible

I’m building a hot air balloon out of my love for you. I’m starting with the hot air, and then I’m going to surround that with saran wrap, because after all, I’m only using leftovers.

This Book Title is Invisible

I wouldn’t want the guests at my birthday party confusing my celebration with the Oscars. That’s why I’m having the awards ceremony after we eat cake and I open my presents. 

This Book Title is Invisible

Love is the most precious gift you could ever possibly hope to steal. Some women foolishly do not leave their rib cages locked at night.

This Book Title is Invisible

I don’t know what’s in the box, but I love it. Unopened gifts contain hope. 

This Book Title is Invisible

The government wants to be aware of all your movements—probably including your bowel movements. Ain’t that some shit?

This Book Title is Invisible