This Book is Not FOR SALE Quotes

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Nothing says I forgive you like a punch in the face.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

I say yes, turn the other cheek, and let me slap your butt again. Forgiveness can be oh so naughty.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

Return something not for the possibility of a reward, but for the joy of giving a gift which you did not have to pay for.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

Sell canoes to those who are enduring a drought, and sell sunscreen to those suffering from flooding. But give love freely to all, because samples encourage sales.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

Rollie Fingers called. He wants his fingers back. And his mustache. Too bad I sold them to 1969 to buy some free love. Wait, if it was free, why did I buy it? 1969 ripped me off!

This Book is Not FOR SALE

Feel free to become a slave to your own clone. And mine. Remember, you can never have too many lovers who look exactly the same as me.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

I give everybody my love, and therefore nobody gets my love. I’m freedy—free and greedy.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

I thought the movie was too short to pay for, and too long to be free. But I’d watch it again, if I were wearing a blindfold and stuffed in the trunk of a car. At least kidnapping is more honest than politics.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

Freedom isn't free. But there are some really great coupons if you know where to look. Buy one liberty, get the next one half off.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

The Mythical Mr. Boo has several eagle feathers, or “Freedom Feathers,” as he likes to call them, that he staples to his chest in protest of any kind of bloodshed.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

If flip flops were oppressive, I wouldn't wear any. I'd go around showing of my bare feet of freedom. And I'd tell everyone that freedom causes blisters.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

Friends, like fingers, are only good if you can count on them, as well as point them in the right direction.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

I have so many friends I couldn’t even count them on one hand—not even if I had six fingers. Now, if I had seven fingers, I could count on them, but I still wouldn’t be able to count on my friends.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

It’s been said that you make as much money as the average income of your five closest friends. Well, I have no friends, so it’s no surprise that I have no money either.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

I lean on my friends for support. It’s better than leaning on a crutch, because your friends won’t accuse you of chugging down all the water out of the goldfish bowl. My friends know I have a drinking problem.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

Friends are like orgasms: you can never have too many, but just try to watch out for the fake ones.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

When I fake smile the corners of my mouth twitch from tiredness, then nervousness, as I wonder if anybody can see my mouth quivering and figure out that I’m faking my friendliness.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

Me and a group of friends meeting in private to bond and have fun may appear to outsiders as a shadowy secret society plotting to take over the world. But that’s utter nonsense. That group meets on Sundays, and takes place in the sunshine, where no...

This Book is Not FOR SALE