This Book is Not FOR SALE Quotes

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Instead of making trash cans cylinder shaped, they should make the mold look more like a person, to help with that ever baffling question: Now that I’ve killed him, what do I do with the body?

This Book is Not FOR SALE

I like transparent boxes, so would-be thieves can see what’s inside. Deception by invisibility—the walls are invisible, and that makes the contents inside visible, and therefore invisible, because people look but they don’t see, as they assume ...

This Book is Not FOR SALE

He seemed to swallow the lie I fed him. I hope he’s not still hungry. If he is, I’ll give him the illusory dessert known as the American Dream.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

When I need to be in two places at once, make two decisions at once, that’s what clones are for.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

The escalator doesn’t work, and you’d think they’d still be used as stairs, but in this economic depression, even the stairs are unemployed.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

In a good economy, people work hard to succeed. In a bad economy, people work hard to not fail.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

Night—it’s the only thing that will cover up one of my black moods. Good thing my depression isn’t an every day kind of thing. It’s an after day thing.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

I’m claustrophobic. Your love is suffocating me and making me panic like the Crash of ’29. Just give me some space, and soon I’ll be all 1930 and we can try to make things work.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

I’m sure you could win with a design that I’d cast off as trash. Such is the curious case of the annual Garbage Festival. Plus, I’m just that good. Or am I that bad?

This Book is Not FOR SALE

Why are desire scales 1-10? They should be 1-12, like a clock, because I want her 1-12, I mean like all the time.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

My goal is to have the most and the best of what I desire. And since I desire clones, I have to be the best me first.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

I asked her to wear something revealing, so she showed up in a prophet's toga.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

The devil appears in many forms, but the most nefarious of all are tax forms.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

God created the heavens, while the devil created doubt. Here is a short list of Lucifer's other notable inventions: matches, the lighter, the flamethrower, and George Burns.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

God, the devil, and Orafoura were walking along a river one day when they came across three naked women splashing in the water. God turned to the other two and said, "Ten talents to the one who can get them fully clothed the fastest." The devil, alwa...

This Book is Not FOR SALE

My mother-in-law scared the hell out of me. But it’s cool, because the stench of Satan reminds me of her anyways. Hungry? Deviled eggs anyone?

This Book is Not FOR SALE

We all wear uniforms, even if we’re conforming to unconformity. People who try so hard to look different end up looking the same as all the other people who try so hard to look different.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

If a woman named Ms. Silver won a gold medal, she’d probably be a little disappointed she didn’t place second. My love always finishes first, while my love always comes second.

This Book is Not FOR SALE