I may not carry a detective’s badge, but I’m certainly the highest ranking member of Albatross Harbor’s neighborhood watch program. And like tilapia, I know something smells fishy when I taste it. In my neighborhood, nobody can take a shit in their own backyard without me knowing about it. I’m like Spencer Tracy mixed with Miss Marple, with a little maple syrup on top. I am the pancake that’s served and protects, without the financial or emotional support of the community at large.